U-bahn, Viennese-style

My favorite European subject, The Underground Public Transport System, is still a great place to gather material - even in a tiny city that only has six short subway lines! I was taking a quick journey on one of those spacious, excessivly clean trains, when the driver spoke to us all over the PA system:

“Dear Passengers,
It’s none of my business, but from where I sit, I cannot help but notice people tearing down the stairs at the sight of a waiting train, biting into a hot dog with one hand, while they use the other to telephone. Folks, please, grant yourselves some serenity. Our trains operate from 4h45am to mid-night. There is definitely a train for you - just take it easy!”

JAWOHL!