recipe for Charming Frenchman

Recipe for Charming Frenchmen.
Ingredients:
1 x sunny day
1 x old bicycle with chain that randomly pops off
1 x girl with grease-covered fingers

1. Put girl on bicycle and let her pedal at low speed for several minutes.
2. When corner café consistancy is reached, pop chain off bicycle and stop pedalling.
3. Crouch girl down next to bicycle and let fumble for a few seconds.
Handsome waiter will pour out of café with a tray of drinks and rapidly distribute them to smiling patrons, shouting: “ Wait, miss, don’t touch that - I’m coming!”
4. Simply wrap waiter around your little finger with dazzling smile and English accent and you’re done! Shake, stir and enjoy!

Alternative for tee-totallers:
Follow steps 1. and 2. but replace corner café with sports shop.
3. Get girl to roll bicycle into sports shop.
4. Fold handsome salesman over bicycle, as they both get their fingers full of grease.
5. Allow to simmer at low heat, as girl and salesmen go ‘round the back to wash their hands and he welcomes her to his country and asks her about hers.

And that, in short, ladies, is all it takes. The French are gourmets, after all.